Mostly Not About Harper

Guess who doesn't listen to me much.

Harper.

That's who.

It's gotten worse in the last few days too, like some new element of age two blooming before my very eyes. Blooming like something poisonous with thorns.

We've been through phases like this before, when Harper has been generally disagreeable, but a few times in the last couple of days I've asked her to do something and she has not only not complied, but shouted, "No!" vehemently. I am not making outlandish requests. When she throws a book on the floor and steps on top of it, I expect her to pick it up. I'm all for allowing her certain freedoms, but ruining her books by trampling them is not one of her domestic liberties. Other things I've thoughtlessly outlawed like the evil dictator I appear to be: throwing cereal on the floor, beating Rebound over the head with a paper towel roll, and dragging my iPod around like a dog on a leash.

It is difficult to deal with such forceful defiance from a two year old.

Deep breathing.

This, too, shall pass.

Matt said, this afternoon, that Harper tends to sprinkle her charm in strategic intervals. Currently, she's about nine parts frustrating to one part totally stinkin' adorable. The adorable comes around just often enough that you don't actually throttle her.

(I guess that was more about Harper than I anticipated.)

Guess who else doesn't listen to me much.

Paid telephone fundraisers.

We get these phone calls nearly every day. Or so it seems; it is at least once a week. And yes I care about police officers, fire fighters, burn victims, hospitalized children, crippled children, and people with any terminal or chronic disease. I want them to have money for research, teddy bears, wheel chairs, and all the other things they need.

Here is my problem; even if we just gave the small, "comfortable" amount to everyone that called, that would be one huge donation. I have to fight the urge to share with these people all the charities we do give to. We are caring citizens. Pardon me for not shelling out $20 bucks to everyone with a phone! I always feel like a bad person after I, nicely at first, tell them that no, I do not want to receive a donation envelope in the mail.

I try to be kind, I can't imagine having the job of calling mostly cranky people and begging for money all day long. I would hate that. I always listen politely the speech and then say we won't be able to help at this time and good-bye. I should just hang up then, but I don't want to be rude. Unfortunately, in trying not to be rude, I have to say no so many times I end up being rude in the end and feel terrible when I finally hang up the phone.

Once in a while I will say yes, go ahead and send the donation envelope, because I just want to get off the phone. Do you know what happens if you don't mail that thing back right away? More phone calls!

occasionally I'll ask the person what actual percentage of the donation goes toward the actual teddy bears, wheel chairs, or whatever they are raising money for. It's usually like 27%. Not an impressive number. Do you give money to all those phone people? Do you know how I can get them to stop calling me?

Thank you for listening to me rant. Have a good night.