I'm feeling a little out of sync lately - in a way that's hard to explain. I think it is partially ripples from difficult times other people are going through. I think it is partially some uncertainty we've been going through lately (all is okay though, no worries). I think it is partially the state of the world and the cold of the winter and the challenge of parenting two little children without, say, a four-day rejuvenating solo retreat once a month.
It's not all bleak and doom and gloom, but it seems like the days are thick with shadows and I'm having a hard time finding my way out of them. Blah.
I feel disconnected right now. I'm having trouble keeping up with blogs, with email (a perpetual problem), with phone calls and letters. Not to mention the army of dust bunnies which now see fit to hold strategy meetings right out in the open. Or, oh help, the fortress of dirty laundry threatening to swallow us whole.
It is a motivation problem, because being connected with friends and having a reasonably clean house are things that make me feel happy, but I just can't seem to get enough of a handle on them these days to achieve the level connectedness and cleanliness that leads to happiness.
I'm in a rut.
We're facing down some changes around here - not in the next week or month, but we're trying to answer some questions about where Harper will attend school next year and whether I will return to work (hopefully, in some capacity, I will) and it seems unlikely that our family situation will look the same in, say, eight months' time. And I think that's good. Because change is never easy (and I tend to go kicking and screaming into any change) but it may be just the thing I need to get unstuck.