Thursday, December 02, 2010

Holding My Tongue

Okay, before I forget, a couple of notes about yesterday's Christmas craft:

1. Contact paper should be with shelf paper - I got some at Walmart, but I think grocery stores, maybe hardware stores, etc. probably have some too. It does come in a roll.

2. Tissue paper I also got at Walmart. I am thinking a craft or education supply store might have precut squares, but I just chopped up some wrapping tissue. I got a "value" pack that had about 50 sheets for under five dollars. I ended up using about an eighth of one sheet of 10 different colors. I'm glad I bought the value pack for the variety of colors but we probably only used the equivalent of two sheets of tissue paper. And knowing how haphazardly my kids would use it, I did not fret over how the tissue was cut. I was going for squares but I really just hacked it up quickly while they finished their lunches.

3. They had pizza for lunch.

And now for today's story...

It seems that most years Harper will find herself drawn to one particular boy in her class and talk about loving and marrying him. Her very first preschool love, when she was 3!, was B. And now B's brother P is in her kindergarten class. (B was a couple of years older than Harper). For a while Harper thought she might want to be in love with P, but apparently P wasn't terribly interested. (Can you imagine how much their teacher must be loving this?)

So we're in the car the other day and Harper says, "I'm not doing that thing with P anymore, now I'm kind of on to E."

"What thing?" I ask.

"Moo-oom," Harper replies, completely exasperated that I can't read her thoughts, "The love thing? Remember?"

Oh, I did remember. And I didn't say much more about it right then.

When I taught (first grade) and the kids would start talking about this stuff I would tell them, "You aren't old enough to date until you're old enough to drive!" So when Harper tells me about her kindergarten love, a big part of me wants to respond by telling her that she's just too young for all of that. But here's the difference - she's talking to me about it. And I can't help feeling like there is a kernel of importance in that, that it is something I want to honor. If I am dismissive of her boy-feelings (or any feelings) now, will she be less likely to talk to me when she's older and there's more at stake? I feel like these little tidbits and nearly-nothing interactions will all add up, even subconsciously, and make a difference when she's older.

Oh, I'm not an idiot. I know she isn't likely to tell me anything when she's a teenager, or even when she's ten, but if I can somehow tip the scales in my favor, I'm going to do it.

Today she got in the car and said, "Mom, E says I'm in a crush with him."

Oh dear.

There is ONE MORE DAY to enter the Christmas music giveaway - what are you waiting for?

1 comment:

bluedaisy said...

Moooom! The LOVE thing!! Hilarious (for now, right?). I couldn't agree with your sentiment more- one of my greatest hopes is that my kids will be able to talk to me about things as they grow up. Knowing that they aren't going to tell you EVERYthing...but just keeping that door open. I think it's one of the most important things you can do as a parent. Sometimes what you don't say is every bit as important as what you do say. A good reminder- thanks :)