We've been meeting with a new early intervention specialist to work on some of Michael's delays - mostly dealing with speech. This is a good thing, important, something I am totally behind in theory. And I really like the woman we're working with. I don't know her very well yet but I think she is good at her job and knows what she's talking about. And I don't know if it is just bad timing or me being hormonal or if Thursday night isn't a good time to meet because we're all so tired by the end of the week, but I have just felt awful after the last couple of meetings and I cannot figure out why. I can't pinpoint any specific comment or interaction or any reason at all that I should feel badly after these sessions. It doesn't make any sense and yet...
I really, really want to be on board with what she is trying to help us do with/for Michael.
This summer we are going to make some adjustments since our schedule will be much more open. Maybe some of those changes will help. It is entirely possible that it's just Thursday night and I'm tired.
I'm so in love with my children, I am just thrilled with how far Michael has come, so maybe I find these sessions discouraging because it requires focusing on all the things that need improvement rather than just celebrating who he is:
It is also possible that I'm channeling icky feelings about other things going on in our lives, in the world, etc. into this one circumstance... I don't know. I'm just glad that it's almost bedtime.
7 comments:
Being a mom of a special needs child, I can totally relate. It's hard to sit and listen to someone telling you all the things that your child isn't doing. I've learned to take their comments with a grain of salt. They make observations based on a very limited amount of interaction with my child. I know she is capable of and has accomplished so much already. As you already know, Michael is a unique individual who will accomplish what he wants when he wants. Your job is to give him the opportunities and to love him for the great kiddo that he is. You are doing great at both!
Also, if you'd like the name of a place for speech therapy, let me know. We really love where Emmaline goes and she has made great progress.
I sure do like that Jen! Great comment.
I love you, dear. I'm off work tomorrow (home putting in the garden), and alone this weekend. Call anytime.
I also agree with Jen's thoughts. Being on the other side of that discussion, I would often hate the fact that we were almost always talking about the skills that a child was 'lacking'. Some E.I. folks are better than others at balancing needs vs. strengths. From an outside perspective, from someone in another state who only knows you via blog, it seems like Michael is a fantastic little guy & it seems that you are doing all the right things for him! I need to take a cue from you and remember to celebrate who my children ARE instead of focusing on what they aren't doing. Hope you have a rejuvenating weekend!!
I get what you're saying. We're about to start speech therapy with Addy for her stammering (as soon as I can get in touch with the right people so we can get her diagnosed by the school district- making treatment free- rather than our pediatrician) and I'm really dreading it. I don't want it to make her feel self conscious, and I hate spending so much time focusing on areas she's struggling. I just want to enjoy the kid she is! But it's very apparent at this point that she needs it.
My first child had speech therapy for a couple of years, and I always felt a little down about it even though the teachers were great. I'm not sure I can put a finger on why.
I hope it starts to seem better. It's great news that Michael is responding well to the therapy though. :D Hang in there!
I agree with what everyone else has said. It's one thing to know yourself that your child is delayed, but to have someone else telling you about it forces you to accept and acknowledge it in a new, much more concrete way. Of course it's hard to handle - if I wasn't I think you wouldn't be as good of a mom as you are. My nephew has had very obvious issues since he was born, but my SIL spent *years* denying it, and has only now that he's almost 8 been able to take things in stride. I think it's wonderful that even though you're uncomfortable and sad, you're not letting it get in the way of getting him what he needs.
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