Not For the Faint of Heart

Seriously.

I mean it.

If you are even remotely squeamish, stop reading NOW. This post will contain information about the disgusting messes these two are capable of producing:

















So you've seen a picture, you've heard the warning, if you continue reading, it's at your own risk.

I used to think motherhood had made me pretty tough when it came to things like spit-up, leaky diapers, cleaning up after the dog. But nothing had quite prepared me for some of our recent messes. Yesterday morning Harper slept a little late. When I finally got her up, not only had her diaper leaked (this happens from time to time, but usually it's just wet/runny), but there were chunks of poo (I told you not to read if you were squeamish) all down the leg of her pajamas. Gross!!! Most leaks I can just stain-stick and then toss in the hamper, but I clearly had to de-chunk the pajama leg first, gagging all the while. Later the same day, she had another baby-sewage mishap with a onesie. Again with the de-chunking. And much, much, much scrubbing of hands!

Then, this morning, I wake up to the sounds of Rebound retching outside the bedroom door. I get out of bed just in time to see him deposit last night's dinner on the floor, looking more like wet dog food than dry. I think I stood there staring at it for about 30 seconds. There's just no appealing way to clean up doggie hurl. Then Rebound prompted me to action by starting to eat it. I grabbed some paper towels and a dust pan, scooped the pile into the dust pan, threw it in the trash can, and then spent the next half hour washing my hands and sanitizing every surface that the gunk contacted (again, with much gagging).

There really ought to be a mommy bonus for days like these. I'll take 100 toddler tantrums over cleaning up anyone's throw-up. Any chance we can get through childhood without Harper ever getting the stomach flu?

Oh, and hat's off to those poor school janitors and teachers who have cleaned up other people's kids' puke for years.